I feel like Jedd and I really need to stay inside. Fletch will be a year old, and even though it might be fun to take him out looking at all the lit-up jack-o-lanterns and stuff, it could be triggering for us. I don’t know how I’ve held out this long with the stress of having an infant. I mean, I’ve definitely thought about hunting. I’ve daydreamed about what it would be like to be one of those stay-at-home vampire moms—the kind who hunt with their gal-pals. Girls’ night out. Blood-thirty in the morning; blood-thirty in the afternoon: who cares? They get through all the stresses of parenting by having their hunting habits neatly tucked away when it’s appropriate, but rage on when their real appetite strikes. These ladies ain’t playing pickle ball.
I was going to spend a while writing, but it sounds like Fletch is up from his nap. We have to run some errands and go by Jedd’s office. He left his energy bars here at the house and needs the iron. I thought after we dropped off the bars, we could go to the bookstore. I need a paper calendar/planner for work. After that, we’ll go and visit my parents.
It’s been hard lately spending less time on the internet and filling that time with actually doing stuff. It keeps my mind busy, but at the end of the day, I’m beat. I had to do something about my social media habit though. It was making me depressed with all the vampires I’m still friends with starting to post their Fall pics. There’s probably going to be an adjustment period before I get used to being more productive with my time. I feel embarrassed saying it, but my internet use was making me stressed and dysfunctional, because I was wasting time and then feeling pressured. Something had to change.
Did Fletch go back to sleep?
I played guitar for 30 minutes today. I have the basis of the 4th song I’ve started over 4 months. I don’t know what it’s about, but lately I’m drawn to the similarities between the wars going on in the world and the history of the vampire-human wars. It all seems so pointless sometimes. Even saying it’s pointless is pointless.
In America, we are so far away from it most of the time. I wonder if it’ll always be this way. It would suck (in a bad way) to be a vampire during a human war, if you were trying to stay off hunting. The smell of fear is intoxicating for a fiend. Vampires have a term called Blood Economy, and I haven’t found another human word more similar than Ethos. The Blood Economy takes in the collective mindset of the hunters and the hunted. When the Blood Economy is good, the state of humanity tends to be chaotic and fearful. When the Blood Economy is bad, you see more hybrids trying to get clean.
It’s noon here. The sky is gray. I have all but given up on the backyard landscaping for the season.
Union of Vampires 